Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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