Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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