this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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