This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
