sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
