just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize