He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
