i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
The Olympian is in my bed
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
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