im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
why do cheetos always look like penises
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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