JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
The Olympian is in my bed
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
