can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize