Please, let me fuck your mom
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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