uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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