I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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