i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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