I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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