Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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