and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
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