i need an iv and a liver transplant
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
