you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
