you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize