She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show youâ€
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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