....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Randomize
