doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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