I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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