white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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