I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
