dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
