when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
