all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
