It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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