this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize