i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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