I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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