So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize