I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
