wrigley field is MILF paradise
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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