My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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