Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I think I died a long time ago.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
