What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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