Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
