I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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