no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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