there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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