i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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