And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize
