you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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