I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
