Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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