no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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